There's only makeshift love tonight.

(Ripped from rebloggy.com)

"To my smile. It's been a while since I've sincerely felt you. When you were real and carefree, when you were honest and genuine and when you were effortless. Now it seems like I'm climbing a mountain to feel you again, it seems like you've been doing nothing but faking it and forcing yourself to pretend that you are happy. I miss you when you didn't know how to act, when you were truly from the heart."

-

Shitty days.

When you get rejection letters over and over again... When people say that grades ain't everything, they are lying because they do matter. They are what people use to judge you before meeting you, they determine the opportunities that you will get.

When the rejections come one after another, you start doubting your self worth. Are you really worthless in the society? Why can't you get what you want? Are you asking for too much?

But no. You are not asking for too much. It is just that there are other people out there who deserve better opportunities than you. They are much capable than you, they have better achievements and better grades. You work hard, but it doesn't correlate to your results. Maybe people work harder than you, you don't know.

People don't understand you. They try to comfort you by saying all the bad things about those opportunities / good things about not getting them. But little did they know that, all you are looking for is some form of validation for your hard work. You are just measuring it in the form of opportunities.

Just suck it up, yanqi.