You appear just like a dream to me.

(Ripped from Kaiyuan)

Happy Chinese New Year to all! :D

So today was 初一 :D I had a bad start, because I overslept and my mummy was screaming all over the place. Furthermore, although I prepared everything (ie. laid out all my clothes and shoes and everything already), but it slipped my mind to prepare my accessories T.T So yeahs, I tried on various accessories today before I was willing to leave my house. LOL! /burden/ Side note: I want to buy rings!

(My CNY ootd)

Please ignore my cramped up face. LOL, :D First time in a million years that I wore a skirt, LOL! && damn it, my tan lines are super obvious. Sobs. My bag don't fit, but at least it is new and because I forgot to shop for a bag T.T

(More pictures of my ootd ^^)

(Posing with my meimei's 独眼熊)

We headed over to my paternal grandparents' house first. Spammed eating 鱿鱼丝 (my favourite) and super enormous pineapple tarts that is almost the same size of a golf ball. Hahahas, :D Collected many angbaos from my relatives, and my 小姑姑 even gave me souvenirs from Thailand. Say cheese! ^^ New loots for Chinese New Year (but unfortunately, 她太不了解我了 because the skirt and top is too loose for me, and the bag is too frilly -.-）Okayys.. But it is the thought that counts, so still a major thankyou to my lovely aunt.

After staying for awhile, we visited my maternal grandparents' next (I'm closer to them since I stayed with them for the past seventeen years of my life :P). More angbaos to collect! Woohoo!~ Ate a simple lunch there. Got 猪脚醋 for lunch! ^^ I only like the sauce, LOL. Then we had a mini gossiping session with the girls in the house (except my cousin, Ainsley, because I'm not close to her). My mummy, grandmother and aunt (Ainsley's aunt) were gossiping about their husbands. LOL! Quite interesting stories, yeahs. Side note: Please die die do not marry somebody who is addicted to smoking or drinking. Life will suck like hell.

Hahahas, #whatwedowhenwearebored :D Spammage of pictures, but I know you love my pictures :P My pretty innocent sweet looking face. ^^

When my world is falling apart,

When there's no light to break up the dark,

That's when I look at you.

When the waves are flooding the shore,

When I can't find my way home anymore,

That's when I look at you.

I will sing to you everyday if it will take away the pain.

New Year Eve :D

So yesterday, I had CO performance, where we performed two songs, namely 金蛇狂舞 and 拜年. I don't know whether it sounds familiar to you, but yeahs I played 金蛇狂舞 before in my secondary school life. Hehes! ^^ Playing that song again brings me back memories. Nightmares, I meant. I was suddenly reminded of the torturous times I went through with my icy cold seniors. :3 I shall skip this part, since today is a joyous occasion. Hahahas! :D

(CO performance with beloved Xiaofang!)

So after that, we hid in the MPH area in school to play Bridge. I only managed to play two rounds, because of my CCA debrief. T.T In a way, we are celebrating Evelias' birthday although it really don't seem like it. :3 So in the midst, Amanda and I escaped for a while to prepare the cake that we prepared for Evelias. However, in the meantime, Evelias decided to 'abandon' us and find her church friends instead. Oh bangwall :x We passed her the cake and birthday presents (planner and snapback) after that, whilst she was with her church friends (who are celebrating for her). Oh it was quite awkward, but nonetheless we managed to snap a picture with her.

(Birthday celebration for dearest Evelias!)

Afterwards, Amanda Weina Kaiyuan and I headed towards Mos Burger and lepak awhile. Amanda treated me a large milktea (thanks babes! hugs and kisses! <3), and the four of us had a little heart to heart talk session. It was fun, but I felt bad because we are supposed to celebrate Evelias' birthday but instead the four of us spent time together without her T.T Ohwell, it wasn't our fault that she had other friends who will be celebrating with her.

After thirty minutes or so, I went separate ways from them. I met up my baby sister, whilst the rest headed home. On the train trip, I heard from Amanda that Weina finally opened up and told them about her problems with her boyfriend. Arghs, I really hate him for treating her this bad! D: I shall not go into details, but yeahs, seeing this scene made me think twice about getting myself involve in a relationship.

Back to me. I went on a Sogurt date with my baby sister. There was a promotion at Sogurt (#spamyourcupday) where no matter how heavy is your cup, it will always be priced at $5.20. Woohoo!~ It was considered quite cheap! Fortunately for us, we went to the United Square branch (at Novena) where there was no queue. :P I saw from pictures online, that the other branches, especially Nex, suffered super long queues x.x Mwahahahas! I'm genius level.

(My pretty sogurt cup)

(Pardon for the unglam because it was taken in a haste)

Then we went for reunion lunch over at my grandparents' house (maternal side) with tons of delicious home-cooked food, then dinner buffet at my other grandparents' house (paternal side). Forgot to take any pictures of the food because everyone is too hungry and they decided to snatch for food. Joking LOL!~ So yeahs, this ended my new year eve! :P So did you guys have fun as well?

Time slows down whenever you're around.

But can you feel this magic in the air?

It must have been the way you kissed me.

Fell in love when I saw you standing there.

Today was a fairytale.

Tie your heart to mine.

(Ripped from Tumblr)

Finally I had some time during the week to write a blogpost, although I'm drifting off soon. LOL! :D Just finished writing Evelias' birthday letter, which is due tomorrow. Oooh, excited for tomorrow! The long-awaited Chinese New Year is finally nearing! I'm looking forward to the red packets, and most importantly, the break from school :3 Typical life of a J2 student who always yearn for a break from school, from the stressful life. Hahahas! :D We are celebrating Evelias' birthday after our Chinese New Year celebrations. ^^ Maybe ordering pizza? But I don't have the feel to eat lehs :/ Ohmanzxc! 

Had CCA practice today again :/ Today was not that bad, because we are only having rehearsals for tomorrow's CNY concert. LOL! Walked over to the nearby bubble tea store with Xiaofang, Kiyee, Junho and Shiwei after CCA. Unfortunately, the store was closed due to the upcoming CNY. We spent our time and effort for nothing. /sobs/ 

 That's not the main focus of my blogpost today. Hahahas, I'm going to credit this blogpost to Hongwei, my class leader. So yesterday, I felt uncomfortable; it felt as though something is churning in my tummy. So he offered to grab me a cup of hot chocolate to make me feel better. Although it was merely a small deed of kindness, but his actions touched me. LOL, it occured suddenly to me that in this small little world, there may still exist a stranger who will care for you, and with this, I felt 欣慰. Okayys, Hongwei is not a stranger to me, but we are not close, so yeahs. ^^ Special thanks to Amanda and Weina as well. Hahahas! :P

Therefore, we should always spend efforts to appreciate people and to show our care and concern for them. This will create a society filled with compassion and hence makes the world a better place to live in. It may seem to be a simple task, but do take a look around you. How many people are showing appreciation to people around them? Even a small act such as saying 'thank you' can make someone's day. Let's start being appreciative now! We should not take things for granted, and cherish the things and people around us. 

You bought a star in the sky tonight
Because your life is dark and  it needs some light
You named it after me, but I'm not yours to keep
Because you'll never see, that the stars are free

I want to feel love this beautiful.

Just an article that I found quite interesting, so I thought I could share (:

You are Always Worthy of Love

By Kovie Biakolo

Love. It brings us to tears, it makes us angry, it makes us fight; it's the reason for silence, it causes us to laugh; it makes us sacrifice, and it always brings us to our knees Love is probably mankind's most talked about subject. We can't escape it even if we tried. We are said to be creatures of love who are always seeking to be loved; it's how we're made and no amount of running away from our make-up, will make us otherwise.

While we live in a society that is almost obsessed with romantic love, we can hardly blame ourselves. The world is a lonely place for many people, especially in places where loneliness is an experience that one encounters more often than was intended for the human heart. In the words of Mother Theresa, "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty." Perhaps because this is when people are most unlike themselves.

We have a great many substitutes for love in our society - so-called chemistry, passion, sex, sweet words, expensive gifts, and the list goes on. And while none of these things are bad in and of themselves but are rather dependent on the context in which they take place, they do not satiate our human desire to experience love. Because love, I think, is more than just a feeling or an experience, but it is always an active-word, a verb, and one in which words like sacrifice and hope and paradoxically even pain, are not too far from.

The only love we have available to give each other is imperfect love. And maybe that is why it still feels like suffering when we love, because it is part wonderful and part pain at the same time. And no amount of splendor in our love can take away the sacrifice, the agony, that we experience in love. Even in the greatness of love, we are ultimately at the mercy of each other's imperfect humanity. Sometimes to the extent that we become uncertain that we are meant to love in the first place. And most dishearteningly, we begin to wonder whether we are worthy of love at all.

Yet in the nakedness of our bodies, despite their imperfections, despite what we think we look like, regardless of our flaws of our character, our most undesirable aspect of who we are, and most importantly, the ways we constantly silence and shame the weakest parts of who we are, we are still always worthy of love. And yes, what is available to us from each other may be imperfect but it does not make it any less necessary in surviving in the world, as creatures that are always and already meant to love.

And indeed, you are not just deserving of substitutes for love, you are deserving of suffering, sacrificing, caring, caressing and beautiful human love. Dare I say, as I'm sure I've heard somewhere before, that maybe even the angels above envy us, because in spite of our imperfect humanity, we are still able to give each other great love and a great many kinds of love. And consequently, we are always worthy of receiving great love as well. Knowing this, why would anyone wish to live another way?

So when you find yourself in the silence of a miserable loneliness, even among great crowds of people; when you attempt to convince yourself that you are undeserving because of some mistake or bad choice or poor decision; when you have tirelessly searched and came up empty-handed, when you have been the very worst person you could be; when you look in the mirror and are uncertain about who you are and what you believe, even then, in fact, especially then, I dare you to hold onto the belief that you are still always worthy of love.

Pages between us written with no end. Our story lasts forever.

 

(Ripped from Tumblr)

So I think that I am super sway nowadays. On Wednesday, I cannot find my erhu during my CCA practice. In the end, I realised some idiot went to exchange my erhu with Shermaine's. So Shermaine was frantically finding hers as well. Idiot sia, that someone nothing better to do is it, omg, cause us so many trouble. T.T Then in the middle of the CCA practice, Shiwei said something that is ridiculously (not) funny, and I split water out. Omg, embarrassing much. It was in the middle of the song, and yeahs :3 Idiot Shiwei, wrong time to talk to me. LOL!

Then I had Econs tuition on Thursday. Firstly, I dropped my pencil case on the floor, where everything flew out. then I banged my head on the metal table. I tried pushing my chair in, but the table was so unstable that my drink nearly spilled. Then while I'm clearing up, I accidentally banged into the guy behind me, and his drink nearly spilled. Ohmanzxc >.< Super embarrassing! I feel like digging a hole and buried my head. LOL!

Ohyeahs, before Econs tuition, I went dinner with Vian and Jordon. Awkward much since Jordon and Vian did not even interact before, although we are all from the same secondary school. LOL!~ I tried explaining to Jordon, saying that Vian will mind eating with him, because of awkwardness, but apparently, he doesn't seemed to get it. LOL! T.T But nevermind, the dinner only lasted for an hour because we are all rushing for tuition. #awkwardmoments

Ate xiaolongbao yesterday during section dinner, with Kiyee, Wanying, Junho, Xinze, Shiwei, Uuen and Yunxuan. The eight of us ordered sixteen xiaolongbao only, and we occupied such a big table. LOL!~ Cause too expensive and we are poor people Hahahas! Then the waitress kept coming over and ask if there were still any last orders. :P Super paiseh, after payment, we exit the restaurant with dignity (not). Then we went Mos Burgers for our proper dinner, and we played games like 'I have never' and 'I have'. I'm the fifth to die, but then still have to undergo punishment (which is to drink up the extra creamer packet thing from the milk tea)

Okayys, now my daddy is like an erupting volcano just because I forgot to inform him that I will be out for dinner yesterday. Even my mummy also never say anything. Fml. First time I see him so angry. Omg, he totally just broke my train of thoughts, and I forgot what I wanted to type. Zzz. Tada, that's all for today then.

有些人天生就具备优异的表演天赐,
或许是因为习惯了带着面具生活吧。

Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow.

地球上最浪漫的一首歌  (by 黃鴻升)

如果我这次猜拳猜输了会不会我就被神取消了
我爱你的资格未来会怎样谁敢保证呢 
此时此刻怎麽轻飘飘的 好像不是真的 

真的 以为情歌还不都是骗人的 
真的 忘了变成哑巴 有多久了 

依依不舍 舍不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
我怕太超现实的快乐 只是你借给我的 
紧紧抱着 拥抱着 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
我的灵魂二十一公克 因为你而完整了 完美了 

把此刻翻折翻折再翻折 
折成一万一千一百一十零一只千纸鹤 
如果说梦是现实的反射 
能不能就这样让我们赖在一起睡着了 
真的 自己原来还有做梦的资格 
原来 伤过心的心还是 肉做的 

依依不舍 舍不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
我怕太超现实的快乐 只是你借给我的 
紧紧抱着 拥抱着 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
我的灵魂二十一公克 因为你而完整了 完美了 


把不可能 变可能 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
你眼神里那一种光泽 心里还是热热的 
最亲爱的 心爱的 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 
把苦苦的变的甜甜的 因为你是而获得 找到了

An old but nice song, :D Enjoy.

You tell me that your tears are here to stay.

(Ripped from Tumblr)

What a sleepy and tiring week. I am even yawning while typing out this post. LOL! :3 Feeling stressed and unhappy now :( I think I sleep average only 4-5 hours a day, ohgawd. T.T Obvious black eye circles and pimples outbreaks now :/ But I'm controlling not to drink coffee, because DJ says it's bad for health. & he ask me drink red bull instead T.T I chose to drink tea nowadays, 把茶当作水来喝. :3

Anyways, this week was the usual mundane week for me. CCA three days a week, as usual. Thursday met Vivian for dinner and Econs tuition. Ate food court, so nothing special. LOL! :D I'm broke. Went home straight after tuition, and got scolded by Jordan (secondary school friend whose tuition ends the same time as me) because I forgot to wait for him. LOL! Anyways, met up with Irwin (my childhood friend who is living in the same block as me) to pass him souvenirs from China - chopsticks and panda magnet. Super cute! Then he gave me cute cartoon socks and a bear (in hanbok) keychain, as well as chewing gum. Keke! ^^ Souvenirs from Korea! Thankyou Irwin.

So on Friday, DJ came to fetch me from my school after my CCA. So we went around AMK and then he accompanied me home. :D Reached home at 10.45pm and got scolded by my parents -.- Haish. But thankyou for your accompany, it is stress reliever. ^^ Stupid Kaiyuan called me in the middle and screamed into the phone asking me where is him. Then DJ said Kaiyuan 的嗓门很大, and he was so shocked. LOL! ^^ Heng I managed to avoid her. I was just 200m in front of her >.< Kpo girl, :P

So went for music lessons and tuition today, as usual. Changed my tuition time to 1.5h because I have prepared nothing to ask him. I have no time, LOL! :D My music exam results will be out next week I think. /prays hard/ Keeping my fingers cross. Please let me pass this round! So yeahs, summary of my boring week. I shall slack awhile more before doing my homework. Today 9pm got TV show again, and tomorrow I may be heading for Sakae Sushi. :P Jelly anot? 

The script was written and I couldn't change a thing.

I want to rip it all to shreds and start all over again.

One day I'll come into your world and get it right,

And we can start a fresh new beginning.

I leave my heart open, but it stays right here, empty for days.

Tired of studying? Then this delicious bowl of Blackball is just for you! :D Hahas, this mixture of herbal jelly and pearls and yam balls and potato balls and all the balls, just made my day. Just to make you guys jealous, :P

Anyways, my first week in school (year 2014) sucks to the max. Fast pace of lifestyle, just don't suit me. Maybe I should migrate to Thailand soon, they take things slowly. You can see from their walking speed. LOL! :D Just some observations that I made.

So what did I do for the whole of first week? Basically just studying, chionging homework, coffee, tuitions, CCA and trying to sleep. LOL! :D I dozed off too often, given that this is the only first week. Bleak future ahead, hahahas. CCA thrice a week is a little too much for me. Why must the school organise some concert and make life so difficult for us?! && January is really a busy month, as CO have to perform for open house and CNY celebrations that are soon to come.

Furthermore, we have econs test and maths test (which I flunked terribly) to study, as well as coping with friendship problems. Okayys, this is not a major problem here. We did not fight or anything. But I can't help wondering why Evelias and Yeeying suddenly become so close that they even went tuition together?! LOL, Evelias never even ask us. T.T

Anyways, met up with Vivian on Thursday for econs tuition. Had Subway for dinner, which sucks because I left my cookie on the table, uneaten at all -.- Econs tuition was alright, the classroom was full house. It was really cold because I'm sitting right under the aircon. Alright, that's not the main point. LOL! :D The main point is, I think this tuition is not bad. They even gave me commission for introducing my friend Vivian there. The lecturer was quite clear, and the fees were still manageable. They are all nice people, although I didn't make any new friends. I am way too shy. Hahahas, (: The only negative part is they teach H2, while I'm only taking H1. LOL!

However, physics tuition was a disaster as usual. This time round, he asked me what course will I be taking for university. So I said psychology. && he freaking said that, "but psychologists need high IQ" Exact words. He is way too mean, too blunt. Kns, I hate this kind of people. Demoralizing shit. 

Anyways, this post sums up my first week in school of year 2014. My boring first week, and more to come. /sighs/ I hope things will get better, if not I will be constantly pulling my hair, and maybe by the end of this year, I will become bald already. Ohgawd! O:

And I'll be gone, gone tonight

The ground beneath my feet is open wide

The way that I've been holding on too tight

With nothing in between

Take a bite of the poisonous apple.

Only One  -  BoA



You’re only getting further away, you’re the only one
As much as I loved you, you’re the only one
It hurts and hurts and it’s foolish but good bye
Though I may never see you again, you’re the only one, only one

We awkwardly sit across each other
Making small talk and asking what’s new
The moments when the conversation stops for a moment
The cold silence makes us freezes (Makes)

Now, in the same place, we become strangers
Someone will shed tears and be left alone
Seeing you try not to scar me
I hate it and I feel ill at ease so I’ll let you go

My love, good bye now, you’re the only one (You’re the only one)
Even at the moment we break up, you’re the only one
It hurts and hurts (Oh) And it’s foolish but good bye (Oh)
Though I may never see you again, you’re the only one, only one

You’re the only one, only one

It ended so sudden
You seem to be relieved for some reason
Where did we go wrong?
Were we aiming for different things a long time ago, oh?

The sharpness of the difference of our start and end (Oh)
The pain that stabs my heart, why is it so similar?
My overwhelmed heart (Oh) Becomes empty in just one moment
How can I stand up again?

My love, good bye now, you’re the only one (Only one)
Even at the moment we break up, you’re the only one (Ooh)
It hurts and hurts and it’s foolish but good bye (Good bye)
Though I may never see you again, you’re the only one (You're the only one)

When will my head erase you? (I will let you go)
One day, two days, one month, or probably a few years (My baby can’t forget)

Someday in your memories,
I won’t exist in it, you will forget me

Only one, only one
You’re the only one, only one

Yeahs, I slowly let you slip out of my mind, my heart and soul for the past few months, and I am proud to say now, I had completely let you go. All I left now was memories of the past. Thank you for making my past such a wonderful one. (:

Let's talk about love.

Interesting Friday spent. :D

Had a-not-so-interesting CO session in school early in the morning at 8.30am :/ Xiaofang, Wanying and a few others were not around as they had to attend the OGL training. It was my conductor's birthday that very day, and we bought him dimsum and cake to celebrate. Hahahas! :D It was a little awkward as I'm not close to the peeps in CO.

Went Causeway Point for KFC (lunch) with Junho. :D Stupid us, we can just alight at CCK where it is nearer to both of us. Hahahas! :D Went home straight afterwards to bathe and meet my new friend, DJ who was freaking late by 1h but he told me beforehand so it was still alright :D

This post's food review is on Tonkatsu Kazan Ramen Restaurant in Liang Court, Clarke Quay. It was very nice and very expensive. Hahahas, :D $12 for a bowl of ramen / rice. >.< Thanks DJ for your treat. We ordered a curry rice each and a bowl of ramen. Yummy! Didn't manage to snap pictures because I scared he will think that I'm a weirdo, but yeahs. I googled the below pictures, :P

(Ebi curry rice)



We ordered chicken curry rice though. (Hahahas, I'm lazy to find the picture of the chicken curry rice). The chicken was freaking nice! The curry rice was so-so but at least it wasn't spicy :P Cheers!

(Ramen)

This is how they cooked ramen, :D Interesting way huh, first time I see such thing. LOL! The salty thick broth was fantastic, super delicious! Amanda, let's go there someday! ^^

After dinner, we decided to go walk walk. :D DJ went to his favourite store and asked the salesman if there is child size tee XL for me T.T Hey dude, I'm ain't that small! Hahahahahas! :D But the freaking tee is super expensive, $46 for a child's. I dragged him away, LOL!

Went for a stroll by the Singapore River. The nightview was super daebak, with all the pretty lightings. Hahahas! :D We sat by the river for one hour plus I guess. Just chatting and breathing in the fresh air (do not stand next to a smoker can already). It was what I always wanted to do in the past, sit by the sea (in this case, tiny river) and let the wind caress your face, with the accompany of your friends. Hahahas, :D The night view @ Clarke Quay is truly breathtaking.



(This is what I saw from the place I sat)

(To my left, I saw many cute boats 'sailing')

It was really pretty, isn't it? But girls, don't travel there at night. Many pubs around, beware of drunkards. Fortunately, I didn't meet any on Friday, hahahahas! :D

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anyways, just wanted to vent my anger on this new tutor of mine who teaches me Chemistry, Physics and Maths. Gah, I feel like pulling all his hair out whenever he takes the opportunity to 'suan' me. Grr, there is a reason why I wanted to take up tuition. Obviously is because my results cannot make it. So stop acting all suck-up and arrogant.

P.S. He looks kinda cute with his specs and height (he is only a little bit taller than me only) and all, but the moment he opens his mouth, everything is gone. Yes, I meant it.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today is MoeHan's birthday. Hahahas, I know you are not reading this blog, but still, wishing you Happy Birthday and great days ahead!

每个人都有想要守护的东西，

原来就算用尽全力，

有些东西仍会失去。

明明知道是这样，

却还固执地坚持着自己的信仰。

我想让你得到幸福，

不管你的愿望是什么，

都想要帮你实现。

如果你真正喜欢的人就是她的话，

我选择放手。

你一定要幸福！